Getting me out of this...: April 3, 2009 / 10:05 AM

There's no way I can not get out of this sadness, loneliness, boredom. Tama silang mga nagsasabing it's Mind over Matter. Siguro iniisip ko nga lang na I don't have friends. I have friends. Definitely. There's my bestfriend since Elementary. We've gone through difficult times, and still we're bestfriends. Eh ngayon, maybe our friendship's just in the idle mood, but it must never mean we're not bestfriends anymore. And there's my another bestfriend. Bestfriend since I don't know when (but it doesn't matter).

Hay. Kailangan ko lang siguro magload at magparamdam. Walang sawang pagpaparamdam. Pero I think that's what problems are. They're things we must not give up on.Haha. Is this really me saying these? :|

I just don't like the feeling na naaalala lang ako kapag bakasyon. Ganun ba talaga 'tong pagkakaibigan? Tuwing bakasyon lang.

No matter what positive things pop into my mind, I still won't forget the sadness of feeling like you're just a second option, just another choice when you run out of things to do, when you're short of friends to hang out with.

But a part of me thinks na it's not their fault. Parang it's mine? And no matter what I do, it's myself I should be working on. It's myself I should fix. And that's a mocking thought, isn't it? It's so mocking that it makes me feel helpless, like I should stop ranting na lang and really be alone.

COME WHAT MAY na lang.

~dramasecrets | bite | Bitchyness